Episode Transcription
00:00:00 – Glenn
Hello, everybody. Welcome to another edition of Empowering Entrepreneurs. I’m Glen Harper.
00:00:03 – Julie
Julie Smith.
00:00:04 – Glenn
What’s going on, Julie?
00:00:05 – Julie
Hey, you know, we got a really exciting podcast today. We have lots of great women on this along with a couple kiddos, and it’s something that is near and dear to my heart. A couple of weeks ago we were here and I had Avery and she was outside giving me the thumbs up and then even asked what my superpower was afterwards. And I immediately hit me that we have to get all of these women together and we have to discuss how do we manage to do all the things with these little ones.
00:00:32 – Glenn
It sounds like it’s a pretty easy thing. I don’t even know why we’re having a podcast on it, but it sounds like we really have to get everybody involved because for some reason, historically it’s been really challenging for women in the workplace with kids because they’re trying to decide are they a mom or are they professional or are they both? How do they juggle? And I’ve I’ve learned a long time ago that if you want something done, put a busy mom on it.
00:00:55 – Julie
I think so. So we have with us Brittany from Colorado. We have Nicole, who’s here from Saint Louis, Missouri. We have Janelle here from Florida, and we have Rebecca from South Dakota. So it’s a really exciting group of group of women.
00:01:10 – Glenn
Here, a dynamic group of entrepreneurs. And as we know, entrepreneurs are not really programmed like normal people. So we have this affinity to be able to multitask like it’s our job. And for some reason, I don’t know if it’s technology, I don’t know if it’s attitude, I don’t know if it’s just individual character of all these fine women here. But for some reason they manage to get everything done and more in a given workday.
00:01:32 – Julie
Yeah, I could. I couldn’t agree more. And you know, I’ve relied on all of them at some point in time for some advice or something. So they all, you know, have have definitely helped me along the way.
00:01:42 – Glenn
So are you suggesting that women and business can actually lend a hand and help people versus stepping on them? That’s weird.
00:01:49 – Julie
I think it’s all about the high five. And I think Rebecca definitely Rebecca and I definitely have put that at nauseam as to how we feel about that.
00:01:57 – Glenn
Do you think that’s just a thing in society or do you just think it’s the women look at each other as competitors instead of and encourage others? How do you why do you think that is? I’ll ask you.
00:02:09 – Julie
First. You know, I’ve never thought about it that way. That’s why I think I can’t wrap my head around it. I see it as we’re all here. There’s enough space for everyone to succeed and everyone to do exactly what they want to do and how they want to do it. And so I you know, I we have always said, you know, I’m not about tripping anyone. I want to pick everybody up, give them a high five and give them the boost that they need to accomplish whatever it is they’ve set out to accomplish, because there’s definitely enough room in this world for that.
00:02:33 – Glenn
Well, I’ll start with Rebecca, because you’re at the bottom of the screen and you’re you’re look like you’re chomping at the bit. So tell us how when did it happen with you, where all of a sudden you realize that people could actually help people and especially working moms to have the ability to be a network of people helping out instead of keeping everything close to their chest and not talking about things?
00:02:55 – Rebecca
I would say, like Julie, it’s hard for me to answer it because thankfully, blessedly, I have not experienced a lot of the tripping. And I don’t know for me, like if that’s a midwest thing, because we’re just like, there’s not as many. We’re like, just cheer each other on. So thankfully, having experienced that, but in some cases I have. But I think the similar to what Julie says, there’s plenty of room for everybody. And I always think like we rise together. I mean, I literally have the sign in my background that says we rise by lifting others. So I yeah, the more high fives I can give to the women around me or even the men around me, the more it creates this huge level of synergy that just keeps going up and up and up. So like the more you can help one another and not piggyback, but yeah, more or less piggyback. Like that’s a great idea. I’ve been thinking about doing it like this for my product or for my service or whatever. I think it just aids us to just know more and more people and just keep helping one another out.
00:03:48 – Julie
Well, and I think you do something really cool, Rebecca And you really have built a pool of women who all kind of work together for you for one vision, and you’ve kind of figured out what everyone’s strengths and weaknesses are and really been able to hit it out of the park.
00:04:04 – Rebecca
Well, thank you. Yeah, I do work with lots and thankfully we have our staff party tonight, so I’m buzzing about thinking of all the people that are coming in and how I’ll introduce them to everybody and what they’ve been doing. But yes, I often try to think objectively, if you will. Like, you know what? That was not her lane. She does not belong in the booth selling, but she can ship like a ninja, you know. So I try him in different positions to find out where their strengths are and then just cheer on the ones that I know are strong, stronger.
00:04:30 – Glenn
It seems like the the cheering and the positive outlook and the wishing for the best and hoping for the best and people is probably a trait that you all have, even though you’re you know, you got one hand back holding on to whatever to make sure nobody’s going to mess with you. But it seems like it’s better to lead with a positive than with a negative or being suspicious. Is that do you think about that, Janelle? You think that’s a true statement?
00:04:54 – Speaker2
Yeah, 100%. I feel like positive energy is contagious and negative energy is toxic. So I think that there’s plenty of business to go around and I think we have to really stay focused on lifting everybody up around us and making sure that the energy that we’re spreading is positive and really focusing on on the good. And I think that’s just a really good example to set for our girls to that. It’s important to really find the positive in everyone. And if someone’s having a bad day, it’s important to lift them up and help them feel better. And if someone’s really struggling, maybe to achieve a goal or build a business, if you can get in there and offer your ability to help, I think that’s really important to focus on that positive. And Nicole too, if I can, the iron out the possibilities, like when a woman does succeed and it’s like in a space that we haven’t necessarily succeeded in, I’m like, yes, it’s that much more possible for the rest of us. That’s just how I view all of those gaps that we get into. And you’re like, Yes, if she can do it, surely we can do it. Yeah, We kind of show each other what can happen, right? Yes, absolutely. Yeah.
00:06:00 – Julie
And I know Nicole and I met, you know, years ago, and we kind of have kids that are the same age and we just happen to have girls that are the exact same age that we actually brought on as guests here. But, Nicole, what do you think you want to instill into Katie about, you know, what we’ve kind of talked about in the culture of women and succeeding and there being enough room for everybody?
00:06:21 – Nicole
Well, I think like like everybody said, here is I’ve never been an environment where women aren’t working together. And I just that’s not the kind of people I would align myself with. But I think as much as we’re talking about, you know, all the good, I think also the thing to pass on to our kids is that you can do it all and sometimes it’s not going to feel like you’re doing it all perfect and that that’s okay. Because I think as women entrepreneurs, we’re probably all sitting here because we’re a little bit of perfectionist. You know, we’re always looking at what we haven’t accomplished instead of what we have accomplished, which has gotten us to where we are, admittedly. But I think communicating to our kids that, you know what, I had a bad day at work. I came home on the wrong foot. I’m sorry, let’s restart. Let’s start again, because I think that’s something that they can take with them in life and it will help get them far and help lift other people up as well when they’re having those same problems.
00:07:19 – Glenn
It seems like it’s a challenge to say, I’m going to be working entrepreneur mom, and then all of a sudden I got to switch hats and now I got to be like hard core mom. And it’s really hard to transition from one to the other, you know, is, you know, how does how does that work for you guys? What’s the best way to do that? Is there like a you know, for me, when I get home, I as soon as I touched the garage door opener, that was it. I leave outside, problems outside and I go in the house and now it’s all about inside stuff. Do you guys have like a a trick or a tool that you can recommend to other people of how they can transition from that? Because technology means we’re always connected all the time. How do you guys switch that off or Britney?
00:08:01 – Julie
How do you do that? Because I think you work from home. And so how how are you able to kind of keep that line and that delineation between, you know, mommy, Britney and working, working Britney?
00:08:15 – Speaker2
I think instinctually women have that switch. I really, truly do. I think it’s not something that we have to really focus on. I mean, granted, there is going to be times where you’re still going to be connected to technology in some way, shape or form. But when Workday is done, I mean, I know for me in general, I have a two year old, so I’m still in those stages of her not being self sufficient, but I’m stoked to get off work and go and be with them. So it kind of instinctually switches in my head because I get to go and be with the people that I want to truly be with. So I just try to focus on that. And I think the biggest thing is like. You can still bring your work life. Women, women never shut off. We’re going to be thinking all day long, no matter if we’re cooking dinner, watching the kid, we’re still thinking about work. We’re still thinking about what we’re going to cook tomorrow for dinner. What are we going to do this weekend? You know, it never shuts off, but we’re able to kind of put everything in blocks. I feel like, how are we going to handle it right now? How are we going to handle it later? So I really don’t think that there’s a lot of planning to it. I truly believe that it’s just an instinctual quality that women have. And when you are, you have that entrepreneurial mindset as well. I think personally it kind of just streamlines into that going into mom life. I don’t think twice about it.
00:09:39 – Speaker1
That’s so funny because as a guy, we think about one thing at a time. We do not multitask very well. And so as a dude, this is how we do it. But chicks have this unique ability to multitask, have 12 processors running at the same time, and as a guy, we just can’t keep up and we just don’t understand how it could be possible. So what advice can you give your significant others that have to deal with you on a daily basis in all levels of your life? What would you say to them to say, Hey, this is what you need from your significant other to ensure that you can give your best?
00:10:15 – Speaker2
I have a glass of wine ready for me when I walk through the door. Is that an acceptable answer?
00:10:19 – Speaker1
Absolutely. It’s.
00:10:21 – Speaker2
Americans say the same thing, Nicole. Exactly. I was going to say, just do the dishes while you’re talking on the phone. Those you can manage those two together.
00:10:31 – Speaker1
As a guy. There’s no way we can do about it. Same time. That’s impossible. Got to hold the phone and put the drink in the neck. There’s no way. No. And again, I think that’s important because with everything we’re talking about at the beginning, it’s all about communication. And again, everybody needs to stop looking at social media and movies because it seems like it’s always mean girls. But in the real life, it’s not really like that, right? You guys have all syndicated that you’ve had great experiences. So I mean, that’s a positive to keep going. And then ultimately it comes down to the communication, the people around you to help you be your best. Is it really just wine and dishes or is there something else? Because, you know, I’m just curious, asking for a friend.
00:11:06 – Speaker2
I think. Oh, go ahead. Go ahead. I would think like I literally formed a whole academy around this exact subject, how to do work and family life. Both. Well, because I think it is possible. And similar to what Britney said, we have the spaghetti brain so we can do all of it at once. Men have the waffle. So it’s like a part compartmentalized. But I think it’s important that we teach that to our children that. So I know I have this huge studio and a big opening to it, and it’s connected to my farmhouse so that they know it’s not like this is Mommy’s work and this is the farm or this is the home. They know that it’s all a part of the same thing. And I had to fight tooth and nail to get the contractor to make it just as big. So it felt like part of the home. And then when they see that I have a ton of joy doing what I love, they too want to aspire to do something that they love so that they can raise their family as well. So I think it starts with like if your children can see the joy that you’re having doing your work, it doesn’t feel like work to them. So they know that you might have to text during a ball game for me to a contractor about yep, I’ll grab the thread because they know. Well that’s important because that brings mommy joy and it helps feed our family. And so if they can understand why you are doing it and the behind and sometimes they will get messy together a little bit. But it doesn’t mean that when it’s time for us to really concentrate, we’ve had a breakdown at school that mom will be completely 100% dialed in during that.
00:12:28 – Speaker3
And I think for me. Oh, go ahead.
00:12:32 – Speaker2
Go ahead, Julie.
00:12:33 – Speaker3
I just think for me, it’s just so important for my girls to be able to see like the sky is the limit and you can do whatever it is that you set your mind to. No matter who says it’s the craziest dream, you got to set your mind to it. And it’s going to take a little grit, a little hard work, but you got to earn it. And I think that’s really what I want to instill in the girls, you know, be independent, but hey, get down, get dirty and go for it. No one can tell you you can’t do anything.
00:13:02 – Speaker1
Nicole.
00:13:03 – Speaker2
I read an article a long time ago and it said woman’s favorite three words were I got this because it’s just the you know, if we can come home and it’s like, okay, you know what? I decided we’re going to go out to dinner and this is where we’re going and the kids are getting dressed, Let’s go instead of this is where let’s go out to dinner. Where do you want to go? What are you just. I got this like us getting to come home and just show up sometimes and have it all taken care of. That’s the one. I think the second thing would be if. If I’m struggling with the balance of both, it’s usually related to the guilt factor of not having enough to give to either. And I do feel like my husband is so good at making sure to relieve me of that guilt. You know, the kids moms here every morning or, you know, mom was just spent all weekend with us and she’s got some work to do or just something so that I don’t feel bad about having to go back in the office and work. So teamwork, communication, I think. Glen, you mentioned that my husband is a rock star. I mean, grocery shops, laundry dishes. I don’t know how I do it without him, but that relieving me of the guilt and I got this, I would say are two home runs in my book.
00:14:17 – Speaker1
It’s it’s funny how to communicate the the guilt that you have like it comes and goes right? It’s not every day. There’s no guilt or there is guilt. It seems like it’s a constant struggle. And I don’t know, you know, as a guy, it’s a little bit different, obviously, than than than a woman. But, you know, that guilt, the alleviation of that is probably the biggest down thing that happens to you, because then you can’t really do either one to your ability because you’re feeling bad about it. So Nicole is obviously a wine is a helpful thing or having tasks done, you know? Janelle, what is what is it that you have to have done to make it so you can not have the guilt and be able to feel like things are going the way they’re supposed to go?
00:15:03 – Speaker2
Yeah, So it’s it’s a little different for me because my kids are a little bit older and I just have one at home. They’re 19 and 23. And so it was harder when they were little because there was just that constant struggle. I completely feel what you guys are saying because I remember that constant feeling of guilt and that is the number one thing you have to overcome. I still think that sometimes I have to overcome that because my youngest daughter will be like, Oh, you’re working again? And I’m like, Well, I’ve had to really kind of help her understand that this isn’t I don’t have to do this. I’m doing this because I choose to do this and because, as Becca said, it brings me joy. And the biggest if I can instill one thing in them, it’s be picky, you know, don’t don’t settle. Don’t just go through the motions and be something because you think it sounds cool or it’s going to make you a lot of money, do what you become really passionate about and then, you know, you’re you’re going to work when you want to work. And if that’s a lot, it’s because you love to do that. So I don’t you know, my husband’s fantastic about the end of the day. He can he can sense if there’s been stress or whatever, he’ll come home before I’m finished so he can hear the end of my zoom calls. And I work from home too. And usually he can tell if I’m stressed. He’ll bring me a glass of wine right at the end of the day. But other than that, I mean more more than anything.
00:16:23 – Speaker2
For me, it’s just helping the girls understand that it’s more important than anything to find something that you absolutely are passionate about and love doing, because then it’s really not work. It’s part of just who you are and what you enjoy. I think too, if you install blocks like we talked about earlier, like for me for the guilt. So mine are still in three different schools, like high school, middle school, elementary, and still instilling these blocks for certain, like especially 30 minutes at lunch time, like in the summer when they’re home, then I don’t feel guilty at night even it was only 30 minutes that day. Sometimes it’s an hour and a half. We live in a farm, so there’s all kinds of things that can pop up and we can do that. I go, You know what, though? I did spend this block of time with them, so it helps me feel less guilty at night or like the hard breaks of the after school hour. So we get snacks. I just touch base with them, talk about homework, make eye contact, no phone. During that time, my staff knows that I’m just going to be plugged in for that hour to kind of figure out who’s the most emotional and what happened physically and emotionally during that day. So those like hard breaks and they don’t have to be long or maybe they do need to be long, depending on the day help the guilt at night, because I’m like, no, no, no. I plugged into him. I know what happened today for them.
00:17:36 – Speaker1
Brittany, would you say that having the ability I think if you’re not an entrepreneur or in a situation where you have a lot of freedom to set your schedule to do what you need to do, because again, historically, everybody goes the office, they’ve got to be there at seven. They work until six and there’s zero flexibility. You can never leave. You’re just locked in with the entrepreneurial ism and what that. Ables It really does empower, you know, when we say empower entrepreneurs, it’s not just helping them, you know, see different tricks and trades, but as an entrepreneur, you’re very empowered to kind of be in control of your schedule. And having that control your schedule probably really helps assuage some of that guilt and also gives you that quality of time versus quantity to get what you need to get done. Is that something that you would probably recommend as a is a really a benefit of being an entrepreneur?
00:18:28 – Speaker2
Oh, completely. I think it all comes in strides, though, right? So I have the ability to control my schedule to a point, right? You still have to have that outside life. For example, my kids are still in daycare, and daycare closes early because of parent teacher conferences. So now I need to figure out how I’m going to work for the day, how I’m going to pick up my child and entertain her with half a day left, you know, and kind of do all of that. But you still. Yeah. You find ways, I think. Outside of an entrepreneurial mindset. I think it’s very possible. And I tell my team all the time who have families as well, who are not in that entrepreneurial role, but having that support from a leader within your company, you can still have that ability to live that life of having that flexible schedule. So making sure that you’re where somewhere that you really enjoy working, but somebody somewhere that you have the back of your boss, your leadership team, anything like that, because anybody could really have a flexible schedule as long as they have the same values and beliefs as where they’re working or who they’re working for. When you are a working mom, because I try to empower within my employees, they’re all moms too.
00:19:46 – Speaker2
So whatever you need to do to handle it, I have the trust in you and I know you’re going to do it because women just have that ability to know how they’re going to get it done. You just you just have that feeling in them. So, yes, I think entrepreneurial is definitely have that mindset, but you can do it outside of that entrepreneurial as well. Just having that support team of people around you. And I think the biggest way to get through get to that is something that I try to empower. My team is open line of communication. I mean, don’t hide it. If you have to come to me and say, hey, look, I got to go early today, my daughter’s daycare, I feel horrible and don’t feel bad about it. It is what it is. You can’t control it. There’s a lot of things we can’t control in life, so control the ones that we can and the ones that we can’t. We take them with punches. And that’s kind of how I try to instill everything in my personal life and professional life.
00:20:39 – Speaker3
And I think Brittany and I think to all of us were all just searching for that balance. So it’s all about that balance in regards to that. You know, there’s give and take and there’s always going to be an opportunity cost for every decision and choice. But at the end of the day, it’s, you know, making the right one in every moment. And I think at the end of the day, then you feel like there’s some sort of balance.
00:20:58 – Speaker2
I think too, like one of the good words that you just said to Julie, balance versus harmonize. Like if you can harmonize them together, where they zigzagged a little bit more during the day is a little less pressure in the balance because, you know, one of them’s going to draft. So like harmonizing is a good way of putting that as well. And then Glen, I would say to like the quantity versus quality entrepreneurism and actually like what Britney said too, like making sure you communicate to your team and stuff so you can still be flexible. Quantity is actually better than quality. So like, yes, they’ll remember the Disney vacation or whatever it is, it’s like a quality time, but they will actually remember the everyday ness and the quantity, the amount of time you spent with them versus the extra special moments that you plan. So I always try to tell my team like it’s actually about the quantity with raising your kids. So how can I be flexible enough that you still get your job done and you’re still having plenty of time with your family and entrepreneur, or is that a little bit more so? I like that route, but I think if you communicated with your boss, you could still have the more quantity.
00:21:56 – Speaker1
Yeah, I think that’s where the I think there’s a huge cultural shift happening where with technology and just the attitude and just the recognition that, listen, there’s a lot of quality women out there that are trying to be really, really good at a mom and working. And that flexibility is going to have to happen in the workplace. And I think it’s happening as we speak. But you’re right on that. If you can get that flexibility, you’ll get those that that quantity of time, because it’s not about such a rigid structure. It’s got to be more fluid. Right. And I think that’s what’s happening these days. Would you guys agree, Ellen Avery, you like having good quality and quantity time with your mom?
00:22:37 – Speaker3
They want to speak so badly, then they get the choice and they’re like.
00:22:40 – Speaker1
Yes, is that. Katie, what do you like about your mom work and what do you what do you look up to her and what do you respect about her?
00:22:47 – Speaker4
I like that she like went on that or said she like helps me and gets me through what like helps me figure out solutions.
00:22:58 – Speaker1
That is awesome. She she really, really enjoys being a mom and it’s hard to do both. So she appreciate you saying that. How about you, Ellen Avery, what do you guys appreciate about your mom?
00:23:10 – Speaker4
She’s nice.
00:23:14 – Speaker1
Ella.
00:23:15 – Speaker4
She helps us cook. She cooks dinner for us. And lunch and breakfast.
00:23:22 – Speaker1
That’s awesome.
00:23:23 – Speaker3
That’s not a good cook. So that’s a big deal.
00:23:26 – Speaker1
Nobody’s died yet. That’s good. Yeah, it’s. It’s. You know what’s. It’s funny, too. I suspect there’s a lot of times, as you know, it’s like everybody there’s not a lot of attaboys and good jobs and appreciation going around. And I suspect with working moms, there’s a lot of really nobody really gets what you’re going through. And I suspect there’s not a lot of people saying, hey, you did good and we really appreciate you and what you do and how you do it, because we know it’s hard and you know, it’s hard to get that. You don’t really need the affirmation, but it sure is nice. And if you can have somebody who your loved ones say something like that, I think that’s got to be a positive, I would think.
00:24:03 – Speaker3
Well, and I think like what Rebecca said earlier is you surround yourself with that positive energy and you kind of attract you know, Janelle said it to you, kind of attract the people that you want to surround yourself with. And so I think although it’s kind of a lonely world over here, you know, we’ve definitely all gravitated towards each other and been able to lift each other up in in those certain times. And I think that’s just so important as you go through it, because you do need sometimes that just like, Hey, get up, let’s go, let’s keep going because it’s not always easy.
00:24:32 – Speaker2
No, I think it’s so fun too, when your kids can see your face light up over something or like we have a certain song that we play in, like, why are we playing this? But I’m like, Cause I just got this interview for the podcast. Like in the Entrepreneurial, there’s not a lot of attaboys unless you attract, like all the awesome people in this podcast as well, like you Mark for your children, what you’re celebrating, you’re like, We’re going to have a dance party. Well, why? Because we met this goal or whatever. Like recognize those moments so that your children see like, okay, this is what happens and this is why she’s so joyful.
00:25:04 – Speaker1
Yeah I think that’s probably a good takeaway is try not to get too wrapped into things where you can’t find the joy in the simple little things because those things not only are a good stress reliever, but it also shares that with everybody around you too, going, Hey, this I guess is a big deal because nobody knows unless you communicate that.
00:25:20 – Speaker2
Right.
00:25:21 – Speaker3
Yeah, I agree. I want to thank everybody here for joining. And Katie, is there anything else you want to add? Because I know you you had a lot to say and we want to make sure we give you all the time.
00:25:34 – Speaker2
Remember you said what you wanted to say.
00:25:37 – Speaker4
Little things I kind of like. I really like that she doesn’t work late a lot, but when she works late, we get to hang out with like our dad and stuff. And then like, the next night we, like, do something pretty fun because she works late.
00:25:57 – Speaker1
She makes it up to you.
00:26:00 – Speaker3
All about that harmonizing, as Rebecca would say. And Ella. Avery, do you have anything else to say? Anything else to add?
00:26:08 – Speaker2
Yeah, nothing.
00:26:10 – Speaker3
All right.
00:26:11 – Speaker1
Well, great. Well, I appreciate you all showing up today. I hope any entrepreneurs out there, especially the female persuasion, can take something out of this to say, hey, there’s a lot of people that really want to help. And there is this network of of women that really want to help each other succeed. And as if you’re a dude out there listening to what has to be said because it’s going to help you be better in the workplace and better at your house because you’re going to be a little more able to understand what makes everybody tick. And again, I’m going to have to go talk to my therapist after hanging here with all you women, because I don’t even know what identify it right now. So, so appreciate you all for showing up and I appreciate it. And again, that’s Glen Harper.
00:26:50 – Speaker2
Julie Smith.
00:26:50 – Speaker1
Take care.
Episode Show Notes
In a recent Barna survey, working mothers shared that they are feeling overwhelmed, navigating workplace shifts, and desiring time to prioritize self-care.
So we thought we talk to a group of working moms (and their kids!).
We talk with…
- Nicole Thousand, from Thousand CPA
- Janel Sykora, from Thought Leader Creative
- Rebekah Scott, from Rebekah Scott Designs
- Brittany Casarez, from Boulder Valley CPAs
- and our own Julie Smith
Running a business doesn’t have to run your life.
Without a business partner who holds you accountable, it’s easy to be so busy ‘doing’ business that you don’t have the right strategy to grow your business.
Stop letting your business run you. At Harper & Co CPA Plus, we know that you want to be empowered to build the lifestyle you envision. In order to do that you need a clear path to follow for success
Our clients enjoy a proactive partnership with us. Schedule a consultation with us today.
Download our free guide – Entrepreneurial Success Formula: How to Avoid Managing Your Business From Your Bank Account.
Copyright 2022 Glenn Harper
